NOTHING SAYS FALL LIKE THE SMELL OF DIRT...

My laptop is still on the fritz & I've had neither the time nor the energy to deal with it. I hope to remedy the issue soon, but you're talking to a gal who has managed to forget about her husband's clothes at the dry cleaner for going on 2 weeks now. I have got to go get those today! Y'all remind me.
Well, fall is officially here. Which means I'll see a lot more of my parents than I do the rest of the year and my dryer will smell like dirt. MC 2 spent the last few weeks of the month asking if it was fall yet. Once the answer to that question was a yes, he switched to wanting to know when winter was coming and wishing for snow. Yesterday that led to a discussion about the episode of Little House on the Prairie when the big blizzard came, the snow was all the way up to Laura's window, & Pa had to walk to the barn. A tidbit I am sure is completely useless to you.
HH has a new game plan for hunting season. He has now decided that I shall purchase a license and join them in the woods. I will hunt with MC 1 & he will hunt with MC 2. However, because he "knows it has been a while" since I've hunted, he feels I need to join him in the woods during bow season. I pointed out the stand is only good for one person, and that I had no intentions of sitting on the ground where the wild hogs roam, but he assured me we would work something out. Personally, I think he has a crush on me & is just trying to secure some alone time. It's either that or he is thinking if we all have tags we can get even more deer. MC 1 is very excited about it. Well, he's very excited about shopping to equip me. Clearly, I need a great deal of camo & pink. The mere thought thrills him to no end, but we are talking about a child who thinks I need a new purse that is camouflage & has a big cross with rhinestones on it, so really, who is surprised.
I think I have reached my phone blogging limits. Plus, it's 4:20 on the am & I have already been up for thirty minutes. Sleep hates me.
So, I shall bid you adieu.
Have a great Friday everyone!

NEVER DONE

If you have kids, or work with kids, or pretty much have any interaction with the fellow sojourners on this earthly walk then you have probably said things you wished you hadn't. MC 2 is a patience testing child. In more ways than I could have ever imagined. Big stuff that leaves you speechless. Little stuff that wears you down. When we were home together and he had tested me to my max, I would send him to his room and say, "I am done with you."
Yep, I gasp when I read it as well.
Then, I try not to fall apart.
Now, it absolutely breaks my heart to know I said it to him.
Thankfully, the Holy Spirit convicted me and corrected me. He showed me a truth I was planting in my child. I was telling him there was a point where I gave up. Where I said he had gone to far and I was withdrawing myself. Now, while my actions were to come back, my words left the impression that a day will come when I wouldn't. 
Did I want that for him? To wonder if the parent who was to love him, protect him, and be there for him was going to someday say I am done.
The hard truth of the matter is a great deal of my heart's battle is revealed in that statement. While I know in my head Christ will never be done with me, there is a portion of my flesh that often wonders if I have gone too far. Have I done this or that one time too many? Have I pushed to the point where Jesus would send me away and tell me He was done with me? With those flesh and fear fed doubts comes an onslaught of twisted emotions and insecurities. Havoc is wrecked in my spiritual life and the damage is played out before me in my physical life. 
That is when I must choose.
To listen to the carnal voice saying He is done with you or sink my feet into the words of scripture that tell me He is faithful to finish what He started in me (Phil. 1:6).

I don't use that phrase with MC 2 these days. Oh, he still tries me and I will tell him I am done with a behavior or attitude. But done with him, never.
Because praise God, He is never done with me.

ONLY ONE

Now I plead with you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you all speak the same thing, and  that  there be no divisions among you, but  that  you be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment. For it has been declared to me concerning you, my brethren, by those of Chloe’s  household,  that there are contentions among you. Now I say this, that each of you says, “I am of Paul,” or “I am of Apollos,” or “I am of Cephas,” or “I am of Christ.” Is Christ divided? Was Paul crucified for you? Or were you baptized in the name of Paul? (1 Corinthians 1:10-13 NKJV)

So this is what I am reading now. Which is good because it's what I see now, too. In the mirror, in the local body & in the church. Some of us get pretty uppity about who we follow or read or sit under for teaching. Those who don't follow who we follow, well, clearly they are uninformed. In my own moment, I actually found myself troubled by one of those I follow befriending another in ministry on social media. 

Pitiful. Flesh driven. Absolutely out of order.

I had to stop, call myself to the carpet & submit to the Lord's dealing with me.

Why? Because my apprehension was about rib issues, and while those matter, the spine matters more. 

Jesus matters more.

The kingdom of God, the glory of God & the work of God matters more.

So let's choose to not be caught up in it all. 

Let's choose to let the backbone of Christ & His righteousness be what causes us to stand tall & not our own arrogance about which book, blog, tweet or Podcast we follow.

Only One died for our sins. 

By only One name are we saved. 

Only One will be the King of Kings & Lord of Lords.

Only One.

Jesus.

SHOTS TO THE RIBS

Spine & ribs. I have heard it. I have said it. I have read it. Issues in the church, both local and global, can be divided into these two categories. The are those issues that are essential to our Christian faith. They are spine issues. They are the backbone of what we believe. They are what everything else stems from. Broken spines leave people paralyzed. There is no moving forward. There is no walking. There is not even crawling. When the fundamentals of our faith, the hard core, non-negotiable items, are compromised, when we can not agree on these, we are immobilized as a person, as a people, and as a church.
But can I tell you something?
Broken ribs hurt.
Those issues that aren't our very foundation, but are important to us, well, damages to those hurt. We can still move and we can still walk, but not without pain. Broken ribs are tender. Broken ribs cause us to be guarded with our movements and protective with our hearts. Even breathing is painful some days. Much less trying to extend our hands, in worship or in assistance of another. Broken ribs cause us to draw in and guard our very exposed torsos.

Okay, maybe just me. Because that is how I have been feeling lately. As if I have been walking with broken ribs. The spine is fine, but my ribs feel like they have taken a beating. Disagreements and doubts are like punches pounding on my torso. Worship is painful. Standing tall is not without some struggle. I am guarded. I am tender. My actions are weighed against the pain they may cause me.
It hurts to cry.
It hurts to laugh.
Sometimes all I can do is stand bent over.

And I don't know how to fix it.
Or how long it will take.

I am not paralyzed.
I may be crawling spiritually, but I am not paralyzed.
I know that.
I am grateful for that.
I thank God for that.

My banged up ribs will heal.
With time, I won't be so guarded.
It's just going to take a bit to get there.

My Healer, He likes broken.
My Healer, He can use broken.
My Healer, He is faithful to touch the broken.
And He will make me whole again.

In the meantime, we will walk together.

Because neither He nor I,in Him, are paralyzed.