THE THURSDAY BEFORE THE THURSDAY...

is where we are. So far this week has been full of epic fails, medical drama, and MCs with insomnia which means a mama with insomnia.
For my part, I contributed to the epic fail. Actually, I pretty much owned it. I did own it. Right in front of MC 1. Stumbled right over a big stone in my way called MY FLESH, completely blew it, and then had to spend the next two days explaining how being a Christian does not mean you always get it right. That even Christians sometimes choose to do what they know is wrong because they are just ticked off. About how when that happens, no matter the scale of fail (hehe), your faith in Christ Jesus and the forgiveness only He and God can provide is what allows you to be picked and set to walking again, and the next time, I can choose a different response.
Yep....good times.
The medical drama...HH owns that one. Praising the Lord he is fine, but Tuesday found him not so sure. Probably would not have been so bad if I had not left my cell phone on my room, while my physics kids and I raced balloon powered rocket cars, but I did. Needless to say when I finally got the note that said husband called, on his way to the ER, and actually called him back, HH was a little miffed at me. FYI - we avoided the ER and visited our local doctor and all is well.
And now I found myself up at 3:21 because I forgot to wash jeans last night and we are desperate for clean clothes. MC 2 has been in our room since about 2, a repeat of last night. MC 1 just got up, wanted to play his DSI and is angrily falling back asleep on the couch.
And I just realized I need to look over a couple of tests for the little darlings at school, so I reckon it is a good thing I am up on this Thursday before the Thursday.....
I hope you have a great one!

I CAN...IT'S NOT...

Mrs. Beverly has been our neighbor for several years. Other than the occasional I have your mail or I am coming to pull weeds off the fence, we really did not have much interaction. I was working, and after her mom was put in an assisted living residence, Mrs. Beverly was just our reclusive neighbor.

The first year I stayed home, we visited more often across the fence, but we still did not spend a great deal of time together. This past year was a different story. It started because she had car troubles and needed to get into town about once every two weeks. I had the time so when she asked, I obliged. When her car broke down a few times, she called me to come get her. We talked about God and church. We talked about raising boys and trying to do the best you can. We talked praying for and loving them when they don't. She told me of her loves past, and her desire for companionship now.

And because she couldn't sleep and listened to late night talk radio, we talked global warming, earthquakes, and terrorists attacks.

One Sunday about a month and a half ago, Mrs. Beverly called me after I got home from church and told me she needed to go to the hospital. She was sure she had Lyme disease. When I picked her up, she was crying. Never....N...E...V...E...R... had I seen her show any emotion. I knew this was bad. I took her to our local ER and waited while they cared for her. What they found was even more severe, and Mrs. Beverly was rushed to another hospital that could handle her failing kidneys and sky rocketing blood pressure. They rushed her out so quickly I did not even speak to her.

While in the hospital, it was discovered that she had cancer. Her return home meant she needed dialysis. During the week, a medical van would pick her up, but on the weekends, another neighbor and I would accommodate. The talks on these car rides had different overtones. We talked Jesus. We talked dying. We talked about her fear of dying alone or in pain. We talked how long she thought she would be with us.

The last trip I took with Mrs. Beverly, she told me about the angels she believed she had been seeing. We talked about what she thought Heaven would be like. I asked her is she was ready to go, which she was. I am ever so grateful that the Lord gave me the boldness to ask if she knew Jesus as her Savior, if she had surrendered her life to Him, and ever so happy to hear her say a resounding yes. Then, with tears in both our eyes, I told her we both knew that regardless of how much time she had left, this wasn't the end.

That was the middle of October. Mrs. Beverly passed away the first part of November. Her brothers were here and she was surrounded with friends I believe.

Why tell you all this?

Not because I need you to pat me on the back. I don't. Truth of it, I did not always serve Mrs. Beverly with a joyous heart. There were times I did it because I knew it was the right thing to do. It wasn't always convenient. It wasn't always what I had planned to do for my day. Don't get me wrong, I was always gracious and courteous, but some days it was with a bit of a begrudging attitude. Because some days I saw it as a bother. And who can be bothered?

W...E...........C...A...N........

We can.

You can.

I can.

We can be bothered to stop. Stop and listen. Stop and say hello. Stop and give a hug.

Looking back over the last year, I feel a mixture of shame and gratitude. Shame for how I wasn't as willing as I should have been. Yet, mixed in that is a gratefulness for the times I did have with Mrs. Beverly.

Maybe you feel you can't be bothered. Bothered to write a letter to a relative. Bothered to stop in on a widow, or a single mom, or a married mom, and say hi. Bothered to help someone out if you can. Bothered to share the love of Christ. To be His hands and feet.

Can I say with utmost humility, yes you can?

You and I must.

Why?

Because, as I told Mrs. Beverly, we know this is not the end.

Titus 3

1 Remind them to be subject to rulers and authorities, to obey, to be ready for every good work, 2 to speak evil of no one, to be peaceable, gentle, showing all humility to all men. 3 For we ourselves were also once foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving various lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful and hating one another. 4 But when the kindness and the love of God our Savior toward man appeared, 5 not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, 6 whom He poured out on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, 7 that having been justified by His grace we should become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.

TRUE TO EACH OTHER AS AGGIES CAN BE

I am an Aggie.

Unashamedly.

MC 1 : Mom? Do you like the Aggies?

Yes

MC 1: But aren't they kinda bad in the second half?

Yes.

MC 1: Then why do you still like them?

Because that is what loyalty is all about. Good or bad, I still like them. Just like Jesus likes us good or bad and how I like you.

MC 2 (from the back seat) : Yeah! She still likes me when I am bad!

Yes I do and Jesus love us to.

And that is how you use college football to make a theological point.

Every chance we get peeps, every chance we get. Impart the knowledge of Christ to your kids or your neighbors kids or the church kids.

Every Chance WE GET!

WHAT THE CHILDREN OF A DEER HUNTER DO DURING OCTOBER...

BUT I DON'T AWANA.....

I have been co-leading a group of 2nd grade boys at AWANA for about 6 weeks now. This is my first year with AWANA and had you asked me during the first two weeks, it would have been my last.

Straight up truth telling time- I had no desire to work with little ones. Zip....none. However, I wanted the MCs to go, and so I figured I would serve my time as well. Well, the craziness that is the first two weeks wore on my attitude, and I apparently wore my attitude on my face. Every single time I walked past someone they would say, "It gets better....it really gets better", and every time I would think, Yes it will, next year when I am not doing this.

Round week three I became aware I needed a Holy Spirit inspired attitude adjustment. In my asking, one of the first things that I was cut to the quick with was this thought-

If you, Rhonda, esteem the Word as highly as you profess. If you, Rhonda, believe in the life changing power, the freedom and healing power scripture provides--- then why in the world would you not be thrilled to death at the chance to help get that Word planted in some little men children, much like your own. If you think enough about it to bring your kids, why do you not esteem it enough to help other kids.

That, my friends, is called a swift kick in the derriere.

Because you know what He was really saying?

Exactly what He said.

Funny thing about God, He doesn't mince words about the Word.

Needless to say, my attitude has been a little better since. Now, Wednesdays are still tough. I am tired. My MCs do their homework at some fast food joint in between school and church. Bath time comes much later than it should. We all drag a little more on Thursdays.

But for me, the investment is worth the payment.

Especially when I think of what I am doing as a form of discipleship. We aren't just listening to verses for points. We are learning how to be respectful listeners during council time. We are learning how to get our praise on during worship. We are learning how to be gracious losers and humble winners during game time. We are learning how to pray for our friends and that no prayer is too small. We are learning that we matter, we are of value, and we are worth the investment.

So no, I didn't want to AWANA.

But now,

I CHOOSE.

GOING FOR MORE THAN JUST MOORE

My sister and I are going to the SMST next January. I have been keeping up with my verses. I have them written on my official SMST set of spiral note cards. I have posted them on the blog. I have done all I was to do except one thing.....learn my verses.
It has been hard and I have been unmotivated. As I was driving to work the other morning, it struck me what was the deal was....I was literally going to see Beth Moore. I was going to get away, to take a break, and to see Beth Moore.
From what I know of her, I can tell you right now, that if Mrs. Moore read this, she would probably say,
"Sweet thang....please don't come for that. Please stay home if that is what you are coming for."
And she would be right.
It is October now. 10 months in. 10 months I have been focused on seeing the Moore, that I have missed the more God had for me.
The more of Him.
The more of me.
More truth.
More faith.
More freedom.
More victory.
As I looked back over the verses I had chosen, I couldn't help but say to myself,
"Yep, could have used that one here and that one then",for pretty much all of them.
But God is gracious to me. He let me see my folly before the year was gone and my motives had sealed my actions. I have 2 months. Two months of more before the Moore, and I plan on grabbing every single bit of it.
2 months of more God is worth the work.
Worth the fight.
Worth the more that I can give.
So, dear sweet Siesta Mama, should you ever read this, please know that while I no doubt will cry tears when I meet you face to face and ask to hug that sweet neck and take a picture, I am not coming to see you.

I am coming for M...O...R...E...

ANATOMY OF A FALL.....

We are coming out of the shoot.

We are saddled up and ready to go.

We have our hearts and our heads protected.

We have Daddy holding us so tight we can feel it.

Yep, it's all good.

Little dust....

a few twists...

won't take the smile off our face

because we can feel Daddy holding on tight.

Then we don't feel Daddy so much.

Things start to get a little sideways.

Things begin to come out from under us.

A twist we didn't expect causes us to lose our seat.

And we fall.

And it hurts.

We come up sucking air.

We try desperately to get our next breath,

feeling certain we are dying.

Tears are flowing...

we are gasping thinking we are hurt.

Wondering where Daddy went.

What we don't realize is that we were still protected.

Our hearts and heads still covered.

And Daddy, He is right there the whole time.

Picking us up....

Dusting us off....

Loving us through the fall....

So that He can encourage us to get up and ride again.

* Photos by Kay Owens photography

For the record, MC 2 said he was "done riding the sheeps!"